In Sanskrit, the work krama, means to take things one step at a time. I love to teach posture this way, putting you in like climbing a ladder. Carefully, slowly and enjoying each step, as opposed to getting into a pose using the slide.
So, much in that same attitude, building your yoga practice is a slow climb. You start with your class or home practice and eventually crave more. That is when signing up for a workshop and getting out of your comfort zone is a perfect step. Look on your studios website, or venture out to a new studio, find a workshop with a theme that interests you. Meditation, handstands or learning Sanskrit or more about yogic philosophy are all popular workshop themes. Just make sure you pick something that is of interest to you and your personal practice.
Every year I pick a word to describe my vision for the year to come. Last year my word was THRIVE, which I think I rocked pretty hard. This year my word is STRIP. Which, believe me, has garnered a good bit of attention.
I have a pretty good (?) history of depression. It rears it’s ugly head and grips me tight, and all I want to do is curl up in a cool, dark room and sleep. Since that is really not a realistic thing for a mom of 4, my default modes normally look like this…eating foods that I know will not serve me (lots and lots of coffee), drinking larger amounts of alcohol and skipping my exercise and meditation. All of these things being the opposite of what it takes to make me feel better.
I'm in the process of trying to find the hustle.
I am a great worker when working for others, tell me what to do and I will do it. I will think about it after work, on the weekends. I will promote your ideas, your business. Talk it up to friends, ask for donations or money. I will share on Facebook, repost on Instagram. Why don't you ask me to do more? I will help you, and I will enjoy it.
When it comes to me though. I tend to bow out. I have the tendency to have great ideas, maybe go a little and then lose steam. A kid or two need something and I drop the ball. A pickup needs to happen, or a rehearsal runs late. There is always something. Always. And if all of that starts to subside, guess what? Mama needs a hot bath, a nap and a glass of bubbles.
What triggers you? What makes you want to curl up into a ball, turn off the lights and sleep for days? Overwhelm, loss, frustration, anger?
How do you cope when this happens? What are your default modes? Drinking, sleeping, sex, whining?
As a whole WE are very uncomfortable with being uncomfortable. So, our default modes are just like a prescription from the Doctor to ease ailments we ALREADY have, put a bandaid on them, and hopefully ease the pain temporarily. They in NO WAY cure the root of the problem. That wine tonight, will not deal with anything when we wake up. Sleeping and being locked away won't either.
All summer I have been multi-tasking like crazy. I have been teaching yoga, planning a retreat, trying to self-promote my Thai bodywork, do actual Thai bodywork, waiting tables, bartending, trying to keep my kids active and entertained and cleaning the house, sometimes even working in the yard. Needless to say, I'm slipping. Not one of these jobs is being done 100%, mostly because I am tired. Exhausted.
What Am I Doing?
You know the old saying "I'd rather have one shiny penny than 100 tarnished ones" don't you?
It's funny, because I feel like the first part of our lives we spend really trying to accumulate pennies, then about mid-way (or maybe sooner) you realize it's not about how many you have. You start to really cherish the ones you do have. You treat them better, and in turn they start to mean more and more to you. You make sure to take care of them, not drop them or lose them. You try damn hard not to lose them, where once upon a time you may have thought..."It's just a penny".
It is hard to really put yourself out there. It is very hard to be vulnerable and ask for what you really want. What am I doing? What the hell am I doing?
I am coming clean. I am going to lay it all out there. For the last 16 years I have been a stay at home mom, the best job in the world. Sprinkled in some yoga teaching as a hobby and it has been a dream. However, with the growth of my last born, my time is slowly slipping away. That means, as my children get more independent, I need something to fill my time. And...my pocket book. I have been totally satisfied the last 16 years to just be able to pay for a couple of lunches here, a new book there. But now, with college on the forefront (2 years away!) I am thinking about making real money. This is scary to me. Mostly, because I don't see myself at a desk and to be honest, I don't really want to be.
A little nervous over here as I am stepping way out of my comfort zone and changing stuff up. That is so scary, but really, exactly what I teach on a daily basis. My blogging comfort zone has been Yoga Addicted for the last decade or so, but has waned a ton in the last couple of years. … I am now, Amrita, I am now trying to squeeze all the juicy nectar from this life.